Last Sunday night we had a family Christmas dinner to go to. As the end of our morning church meetings approached, I had it in my head that I felt like wearing my T-shirt of Admiral Ackbar with his fingers stuck in a finger trap.
As I was changing out of my Sunday shirt and tie, my wife asked me if I had a Christmas shirt to wear. Other than an old, red, work shirt with a tree topped with a gift card, from when I worked at a now defunct video store, I somehow don't have an actual Christmas shirt. I used to have a Mother Goose and Grimm shirt with Santa Claus on the phone, surrounded by Elvis impersonators, saying, “No, no! I said elves! Send me 50 elves!” but I had thrown it away long after it started falling apart.
I showed my wife my Admiral Ackbar shirt and said, “This is kind of festive, isn't it?”
“What?!” she said.
“Don't some people play with finger traps at Christmas? They're made of woven wicker, and that's a festive thing, isn't it? Like wicker baskets?”
My wife started laughing and couldn't stop for a minute. Then she had to take a picture of me wearing the shirt and tell everybody about it on Facebook.